Asynchronous Development in Highly Sensitive Children
Gifted children or highly sensitive kids often exhibit a unique trajectory of development known as asynchronous development. This term describes children who may excel intellectually beyond their peers, yet emotionally and socially, they may appear to be lagging. Understanding this unique pattern of development is crucial for parents and caregivers to foster a supportive and nurturing environment for these children.
Understanding Asynchronous Development
Asynchronous development in highly sensitive children is akin to them having different ages simultaneously. For instance, a 5-year-old might exhibit the intellectual prowess of a 9-year-old, yet emotionally, they might behave like a 2-year-old.
One mother shares her experiences with her gifted son, who read "The Hobbit" at the age of 6, yet struggled with age-appropriate movies due to his heightened sensitivity. He excelled in drawing, but often lost pencils during simple school tasks. He could solve complex math problems, but found it challenging to eat dinner without spilling or falling off a chair.
The Importance of Recognizing Asynchronous Development
Recognizing and understanding asynchronous development is essential for parents and caregivers. This knowledge can help manage expectations and prevent frustration or emotional challenges in interactions with these children, which could potentially hinder their emotional and social development further.
Parents need to exercise patience, offer support during moments of frustration, and find unconventional solutions that cater specifically to these children.
Strategies for Supporting Asynchronous Development
Based on Gordon Neufeld's course on sensitive children, parents should avoid rushing their child's intellectual development. While it's tempting to provide more intellectual challenges like extra classes or advanced books, this approach could be counterproductive.
These children need plenty of playtime, which helps them develop crucial skills such as self-regulation, attention, and organization. They also need to engage in physical activities both indoors and outdoors for better coordination and diverse sensory experiences.
One key challenge is that these kids receive complex emotional information along with their intellectual input, which can complicate their development. As such, it's advisable not to rush them into reading books outside of their age range. These books may be intellectually stimulating, but they can provoke emotions that a preschooler's brain isn't ready to process.
Instead, introduce age-appropriate stories that allow them to gradually grasp, process, and experience emotions. As their emotional system matures, you can then introduce more complex books.
While this perspective may not be popular, it offers a different viewpoint for parents and caregivers to reflect on when navigating the asynchronous development in their highly sensitive children.
Remember, every child is unique, and what works for one might not work for another. The key is to be patient, understanding, and supportive, providing them with the environment they need to thrive.
